DTF?...I apologize. I had never been with a single person before you. I am not sure how it works when you are dating someone who is dating someone else, and intro– oh, we already ran into one another earlier.
[ He glances down at the ground. ]
He does indeed remind me of Dr. Ratio in appearance and mannerisms. [ Same as Kaveh reminds him of Aventurine sometimes, so Sunday definitely has an oddly specific type. ] You are quite fortunate.
[ no need to explain dtf right now. he can save that for later... if ever. ] I don't know either. I'm no relationship expert. And I... I'll be honest. [ he hesitates, feeling his chest tighten, because it's hard not to just fall back into bad habits. ] I never saw myself in a real relationship. [ kaveh shuts his eyes to focus on smothering all the reminders of his failures and fuck ups, ...how he's the reason time & time again for his own misery, which is evident af right now too. ]
Wh- [ his eyes snap open and he looks mortified. ] When?! [ he laughs nervously. ] What do you, uh, m- mean?
[ focus, you idiot, focus. ] B- But I, I can't claim to have all the answers. Most answers or really even... any. [ his shoulders sink inward as he sighs, letting his head hang in shame, because he's definitely not instilling confidence in either of them. ] I only know one thing for certain... and that's how I feel about you and Alhaitham. I'm sorry.
Why did you not see yourself in a relationship? It sounds like you two had all these feelings and simply needed to talk it out. You could have been together this whole time in your own world if you had realized sooner that you both felt that same way. What you really need to work on is communicating your wants and needs to one another as plainly as you can manage and not being dragged down by any self-hatred.
And he helped me at the school earlier as well. You can say that is when I knew that he was always who your heart was set on.
… [ kaveh takes a step back and sets a hand over his, laughing a bit deliriously… but only because he’s desperately trying to avoid break down. he really doesn’t want to start sobbing again. ] Because I’m a pathetic good for nothing loser!
Ha…! [ kaveh barks out a laugh. ] For the longest time there was no communication between us, because of a huge fight we had during our Akademiya days. [ he turns his head aside as he feels his hand grow hot and wet. so much for keeping it together. ] My feelings were the least of my concern, Sunday. I was just the sad sack of shit he found drunk in the bar because I fucked up… again.
And the more I think about it the more I wonder… why. [ what does he bring to the table? ]
[ kaveh shakes his head, his hand dropping from his face to his chest. he grabs a fist full of the material and twists it in hand. ] If that’s what you think then you don’t know what my heart wants.
[ Sunday frowns before moving closer and pulling Kaveh into a hug as his wings grow out to cover him as much as possible, offering him some shelter from any curious eyes. ]
You are not. I never thought you were. I always thought of you as brilliant and kind and honest...Whatever mistakes you made in the past, they were never out of malice. You are not cruel in the slightest.
Alhaitham also would not have taken you in if he did not care and did not possess the capacity to overlook your faults. I wish you could see how amazing you are. Amazing enough for me to– [ fall in love with. ] ...get along with well.
I would have let you go already if I did not think you were special, but I am willing to try being a part-time date to keep some part of you even if I cannot have all of you anymore.
[ kaveh’s quick to step back and sprout his own wings, so he can use them as a buffer to avoid being taken in a hug. ] What I actually am and what you think I am are two completely different things.
…that doesn’t sound all that amazing. I get along with the majority of people. [ an attempt was made, sunday. ]
Part time date… stop thinking about this like a math equation. It’s not parts and wholes. It’s I’m in love with you too and I don’t want to lose the beautiful relationship we started.
[ His eyes grow soggy as he crumples to the ground. ]
Neither do I. I still love you, too. Call me selfish, but I was so happy thinking you wanted to spend more time with me when you talked about our own place.
That joy then felt premature and short-lived, and I was scared since I was already rejected once before. I had gotten over it, but having it happen twice in succession felt hard to bear and that perhaps the problem lay within me.
And I love you too. [ as soon as sunday crumples to the ground kavehh rushes over and drops to his knees, throwing his arms around sunday to drag him straight into a tight ( and loving ) embrace. ] It's okay to be selfish. And I want to spend time with you, all my time, but... I'm the selfish one. I want the both of you. And I still want to find, repair, and decorate a house... one of our very own...
[ he folds his wings around sunday and continues to hold him closely. he's not letting go. ] It's not you. Sunday... you're an amazing person and I'm so lucky to have you as my boyfriend. I love you so much and I'm lucky that the both of you are so understanding because I really don't think I could live without either of you. No, I know I can't. And that's why I've been such a mess lately.
I am fortunate to have you too in return. I do not want to lose you.
[ He squeezes Kaveh tight as his wings brush against Kaveh's. ]
Please tell me what I must do to keep you. Go on a three-person dates? Invite him into the bedroom? He is handsome, but I simply do not know him well enough yet to feel anything beyond physical attraction. It was difficult enough to share any of my desires with you while being afraid of being mocked, but I can at least be present and assist?
…you have me, Sunday. I’m not going anywhere. I don’t want to go anywhere and I’m hoping that you’re not going to go anywhere either. I want you right here. [ he tightens his grip on him, scared that, if he lets go, that he’ll lose him for good… ] If you’re not comfortable with either of those things, then no. We can take it slow. I want you two to get to know each other, first as friends, and if things evolve from there… then great. If not, then that’s fine too. We can still have time to ourselves. Time for only me and you.
And I hope you know I’ll never mock you. Your desires are my desires. [ he gives him a kiss on the forehead. ] And making you happy makes me happy.
I cannot control if I leave this world or not, but while I am here, I am always available to you.
And I can try at least and see how it goes with a three-person date. It would be difficult to visit otherwise and be intimate, and I do not want to make my sister leave the apartment on our behalf. I could also try watching you both? I know Dr. Ratio and Aventurine had invited me to do the same for education, but I do not think they were serious.
At least, I would learn what you both enjoy and other acts beyond my own strange desires, which I would prefer to never tell anyone else again about.
...and I can't control when I leave this world, but [ he hesitantly stirs the dendro mark on sunday's belly. ] I'll always be with you. Maybe... we can find something that you can give to me, so that, even when we do temporarily part ways, it'll be like you're still with me. [ he scoots that much closer. ] I'll find a way to find you. I don't know how, but... I will.
And you can always come over. We don't share a room and I already said I don't mind keeping things separate... at least until you're comfortable. We can start with a date. A normal date; dinner & a movie.
I don't think your desires are strange. I mean, if they are, then my own are equally strange. [ he cups sunday's cheeks. ] We seem to share a number of the same kinks...
[ The warmth spreads through the point of contact, making him flush slightly. ]
If we had sterile instruments, I could give you an earring to match mine, though I would have to ask for one that is high quality rather than risk putting dirty metals in your ear.
And you are rather loud. I do not think even your room walls would block much from escaping. I would feel too uneasy about performing those kinks where they could be heard.
I'll ask for the tools and the earring for my next burden. Together we'll draw up something special, unique, and one-of-a-kind. We can even get a pair if you'd like another. But I want something. [ he's about to lift his hands up for a kiss when sunday calls him loud and he just turns red instead. ] I... I'm not loud. I, you, it... it's not just me! You too! [ inflates his cheeks with a huff. ] Mehrak got the gag and we could go to the sex shop and... invest in some things to... help. We also both have tentacle like appendages we can use... [ use yours more sunday! ]
I would not mind an extra one, though it would have to be small so it does not weigh down my wings too much. And you are far louder. I am not sure the gag would be enough.
Even if we were completely quiet, I would still feel strange with someone a few feet away. What if there is an emergency, and he walks in while one of us is bound?
[ The embarrassment would kill him. ]
I also would feel strange about spending the evening since he would know even if we are quiet.
...well, you have something of mine already so let's focus on something of yours for me first, and then if you'd really like another piercing we'll already have the tools to take care of it. [ he didn't think about how it might affect his wings, so now he's a little hesitant. ] I, no, th- that... I am not, and I can be quiet, I just... you seem to like it when I, I'm loud. Admit it. [ bristles, trying to look annoyed but only managing to look embarrassed. ] A gag would be more than enough!
... [ that would be hot af. ] We could look into that house. I did originally think it would be a good place to [ he brings a hand to his mouth, clearing his throat. ] fuck, since we wouldn't have to worry about sisters, roommates, and neighbors...
[ he keeps a firm hold on sunday's hands. ] Of course he's going to know. Even if we're not at the house I'm sure he'll piece together what's going on elsewhere. Alhaitham's really smart. [ and it's not like it'd take a genius to figure this out. ] But I at least want the three of us to spend time together. N- Normal time. To get to know each other. I can even make dinner again. [ he'll make whatever you want, sunday. ] Just... don't go.
I do but not when there are others listening in. Some things I would like to keep for myself only rather than share them with the world. Think of it like your spores...would you like another man filling me with them after marking me?
And I imagine you would still wish to live full-time with Alhaitham, so a house would not necessarily solve much just like I do not want to leave my sister unless she has a roommate, so I do not have to worry all the time.
We can shelve the thought for the future and start with dinner for all of us. I can make some dessert so I do not come by empty-handed. Would you like me to bring wine as well?
…no. I selfishly don’t want anybody stuffing that hole of yours with anything like that, but I… I know that’s taking things a bit too far given… everything.
I was living along before, and this is the same living situation we had back in Teyvat… and until your sister found herself a roommate we wouldn’t be sharing a roof either, so…
M- Maybe it could be something to strive for. I wouldn’t mind it if we all stayed together, after, a- and if, you get along. I… [ probably shouldn’t be overly hopeful & excited. his luck is abysmal, but it’s hard not to be optimistic. ]
I’ll leave dessert to you then. And wine sounds great. Two bottles. [ because he’s going to need one for himself. ] I imagine it might be a little awkward to ask you to come back to my room just to… cuddle, so if you were amendable, then… maybe your room?
[ His wings spread and shift to cover his cheeks. ]
What if I only ever wanted your plant spores and eggs and no one else's? That could be for you and you alone.
And I will do my best to get along with your friend. We both love you, so we already have something in common...and if he really is a lot like Dr. Ratio, we will probably at least be intellectually compatible with one another. I cannot say how that would translate sexually since I have not been with anyone but you.
[ Maybe it'd be less weird if he were more experienced himself, but he's sure he can find some books on this in the sex shop to get him up to speed. ]
And you can come over and help me fix breakfast for my sister. She brought me sundaes last night from Penacony, so I would like to spoil her in return when she wakes up.
I… yeah, I don’t know Dr. Ratio beyond [ his tits. ] seeing him, but Alhaitham is the Akademiya Scribe, and its Former Acting Grand Sage. He might be my junior, but he’s incredibly bright. But there’s no need to be thinking about that yet… sex, I mean.
I’m pretty sure I made it clear that I’m not relationship expert. This is new to me too. Well all figure this out together… a- and for what it’s worth, I may have fantasized about a lot of [ clears his throat. ] kinky stuff, but you were my first too. [ he gives a gentle tug on one of sunday’s wings. ]
Do you have what you need in your fridge, or do we need to make a quick run to the store… it’s early enough that we could go and come back before she’s up. [ probably. ]
[ Wait, wait, what. He pulls back a bit and grabs Kaveh by the arms in disbelief. ]
How did you not–? You are quite a bit older than I, aren't you? And you had all these toys? And you are obsessed with the big ones? You are also very beautiful?? Why didn't you tell me?
We should have waited, but I didn't bother since I thought you already had multiple partners before. I did not think one more would matter.
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Re: day 67 late / 68 early
[ He glances down at the ground. ]
He does indeed remind me of Dr. Ratio in appearance and mannerisms. [ Same as Kaveh reminds him of Aventurine sometimes, so Sunday definitely has an oddly specific type. ] You are quite fortunate.
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
Wh- [ his eyes snap open and he looks mortified. ] When?! [ he laughs nervously. ] What do you, uh, m- mean?
[ focus, you idiot, focus. ] B- But I, I can't claim to have all the answers. Most answers or really even... any. [ his shoulders sink inward as he sighs, letting his head hang in shame, because he's definitely not instilling confidence in either of them. ] I only know one thing for certain... and that's how I feel about you and Alhaitham. I'm sorry.
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
And he helped me at the school earlier as well. You can say that is when I knew that he was always who your heart was set on.
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
Ha…! [ kaveh barks out a laugh. ] For the longest time there was no communication between us, because of a huge fight we had during our Akademiya days. [ he turns his head aside as he feels his hand grow hot and wet. so much for keeping it together. ] My feelings were the least of my concern, Sunday. I was just the sad sack of shit he found drunk in the bar because I fucked up… again.
And the more I think about it the more I wonder… why. [ what does he bring to the table? ]
[ kaveh shakes his head, his hand dropping from his face to his chest. he grabs a fist full of the material and twists it in hand. ] If that’s what you think then you don’t know what my heart wants.
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
You are not. I never thought you were. I always thought of you as brilliant and kind and honest...Whatever mistakes you made in the past, they were never out of malice. You are not cruel in the slightest.
Alhaitham also would not have taken you in if he did not care and did not possess the capacity to overlook your faults. I wish you could see how amazing you are. Amazing enough for me to– [ fall in love with. ] ...get along with well.
I would have let you go already if I did not think you were special, but I am willing to try being a part-time date to keep some part of you even if I cannot have all of you anymore.
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…that doesn’t sound all that amazing. I get along with the majority of people. [ an attempt was made, sunday. ]
Part time date… stop thinking about this like a math equation. It’s not parts and wholes. It’s I’m in love with you too and I don’t want to lose the beautiful relationship we started.
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Neither do I. I still love you, too. Call me selfish, but I was so happy thinking you wanted to spend more time with me when you talked about our own place.
That joy then felt premature and short-lived, and I was scared since I was already rejected once before. I had gotten over it, but having it happen twice in succession felt hard to bear and that perhaps the problem lay within me.
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[ he folds his wings around sunday and continues to hold him closely. he's not letting go. ] It's not you. Sunday... you're an amazing person and I'm so lucky to have you as my boyfriend. I love you so much and I'm lucky that the both of you are so understanding because I really don't think I could live without either of you. No, I know I can't. And that's why I've been such a mess lately.
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
[ He squeezes Kaveh tight as his wings brush against Kaveh's. ]
Please tell me what I must do to keep you. Go on a three-person dates? Invite him into the bedroom? He is handsome, but I simply do not know him well enough yet to feel anything beyond physical attraction. It was difficult enough to share any of my desires with you while being afraid of being mocked, but I can at least be present and assist?
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
And I hope you know I’ll never mock you. Your desires are my desires. [ he gives him a kiss on the forehead. ] And making you happy makes me happy.
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
And I can try at least and see how it goes with a three-person date. It would be difficult to visit otherwise and be intimate, and I do not want to make my sister leave the apartment on our behalf. I could also try watching you both? I know Dr. Ratio and Aventurine had invited me to do the same for education, but I do not think they were serious.
At least, I would learn what you both enjoy and other acts beyond my own strange desires, which I would prefer to never tell anyone else again about.
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
And you can always come over. We don't share a room and I already said I don't mind keeping things separate... at least until you're comfortable. We can start with a date. A normal date; dinner & a movie.
I don't think your desires are strange. I mean, if they are, then my own are equally strange. [ he cups sunday's cheeks. ] We seem to share a number of the same kinks...
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
If we had sterile instruments, I could give you an earring to match mine, though I would have to ask for one that is high quality rather than risk putting dirty metals in your ear.
And you are rather loud. I do not think even your room walls would block much from escaping. I would feel too uneasy about performing those kinks where they could be heard.
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Re: day 67 late / 68 early
Even if we were completely quiet, I would still feel strange with someone a few feet away. What if there is an emergency, and he walks in while one of us is bound?
[ The embarrassment would kill him. ]
I also would feel strange about spending the evening since he would know even if we are quiet.
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
... [ that would be hot af. ] We could look into that house. I did originally think it would be a good place to [ he brings a hand to his mouth, clearing his throat. ] fuck, since we wouldn't have to worry about sisters, roommates, and neighbors...
[ he keeps a firm hold on sunday's hands. ] Of course he's going to know. Even if we're not at the house I'm sure he'll piece together what's going on elsewhere. Alhaitham's really smart. [ and it's not like it'd take a genius to figure this out. ] But I at least want the three of us to spend time together. N- Normal time. To get to know each other. I can even make dinner again. [ he'll make whatever you want, sunday. ] Just... don't go.
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
And I imagine you would still wish to live full-time with Alhaitham, so a house would not necessarily solve much just like I do not want to leave my sister unless she has a roommate, so I do not have to worry all the time.
We can shelve the thought for the future and start with dinner for all of us. I can make some dessert so I do not come by empty-handed. Would you like me to bring wine as well?
1/3
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M- Maybe it could be something to strive for. I wouldn’t mind it if we all stayed together, after, a- and if, you get along. I… [ probably shouldn’t be overly hopeful & excited. his luck is abysmal, but it’s hard not to be optimistic. ]
I’ll leave dessert to you then. And wine sounds great. Two bottles. [ because he’s going to need one for himself. ] I imagine it might be a little awkward to ask you to come back to my room just to… cuddle, so if you were amendable, then… maybe your room?
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
What if I only ever wanted your plant spores and eggs and no one else's? That could be for you and you alone.
And I will do my best to get along with your friend. We both love you, so we already have something in common...and if he really is a lot like Dr. Ratio, we will probably at least be intellectually compatible with one another. I cannot say how that would translate sexually since I have not been with anyone but you.
[ Maybe it'd be less weird if he were more experienced himself, but he's sure he can find some books on this in the sex shop to get him up to speed. ]
And you can come over and help me fix breakfast for my sister. She brought me sundaes last night from Penacony, so I would like to spoil her in return when she wakes up.
1/3
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
I’m pretty sure I made it clear that I’m not relationship expert. This is new to me too. Well all figure this out together… a- and for what it’s worth, I may have fantasized about a lot of [ clears his throat. ] kinky stuff, but you were my first too. [ he gives a gentle tug on one of sunday’s wings. ]
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
Re: day 67 late / 68 early
How did you not–? You are quite a bit older than I, aren't you? And you had all these toys? And you are obsessed with the big ones? You are also very beautiful?? Why didn't you tell me?
We should have waited, but I didn't bother since I thought you already had multiple partners before. I did not think one more would matter.
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